The Adventures of HM Queen
by HM-Babe
Summary: These are the tales of the HM Queen. Tales of romance, action, and drama. All with comedy thrown in! This is my first attempt at comedy so be nice.
1. Trouble in the Village

The Adventures of HM Queen

Problems at the Castle

Welcome to the humble story of the HM Queen. I am her highness' announcer, Dunlow. I will announce things to you from time to time. Please enjoy the story.

One day in the castle, the HM Queen was sitting in her throne room, casually tossing daggers at a picture of Karen that was stuck to a dart board, when all of a sudden, a gaurd walks in.

"What is it gaurd?" asked the queen, lazily.

"I have a prisoner." said the gaurd as he shoved Cliff into the room.

"What is his crime?" asked the queen, more interested in the matter at hand.

"He was trying to sneak into the castle, your majesty." said the gaurd angrily.

"Hmm...interesting. You may leave now, gaurd." said the queen as she motioned for him to leave. "Now, Cliff, come here." Cliff then walks up to a few feet infront of the throne. "Why did you try to sneak into the castle?"

"I had to see you, your highness. There is trouble with three of the townsfolk." Cliff said worriedly.

"Ok, please go fetch the townspeople in question and bring them all to me." said the queen sternly. Cliff left and did as he was told. He returned to the castle with Rick, Karen, and Popuri.

"Here are the people you asked for, your highness" said Cliff, walking up the side of the throne.

"Very good. Now, Karen, what seems to be the problem?" the queen asked.

"Well, your grace..." began Karen.

---Flash Back---

Karen was walking down the streets of Mineral Town and came across Popuri crying.

"What's wrong?" asked Karen.

"I caught Rick making out with my boyfriend!" yelled Popuri through her tears.

"Uh huh ok then." said Karen sarcastically as she walked toward the chiken farm. Then she saw Rick making out with a chiken.

---End Flash Back---

"And that's what happened. How could he choose a chiken over me?" Karen squeeled.

"Well, Chiko is a better kisser than you." said Rick. Chiko is obviously the chiken, which is underneath Rick's arm durning all of this.

"But Chiko is my boyfriend!" squeeled Popuri.

"I thought Kai was your boyfriend." said the queen a bit confused.

"Well...he is. I guess Chiko is my guy on the side." Popuri said matter of factly.

"Ok I can fix this. I'll take Chiko from you, Rick." said the queen as she took the chiken and set it down on the floor. "And I'll give you a girl chiken. Here is Chika. That's a little less weird." the queen continued as she handed Rick a female chiken. Then Rick and Chika ran away happily.

"What about me?" yelled Karen.

"Ok fine." said the queen as she stepped off her throne and walked over to a nearby closet. She opened the closet door and pulls Kai out and hands him to Karen. "I always thought you two made a better match." Then Karen runs away, pulling Kai behind her.

"Ok that was too easy." said the queen rubbing her eyes in frustration.

"What about me?" yelled Popuri.

"Ah, yes. The loud one. What about you?"

"You just gave away my boyfriend!" screeched Popuri.

"You can have your guy on the side. Chiko." said the queen tossing the chiken at Popuri. Popuri takes the chiken and runs away happily.

**A/N: hope you liked that. This is my very first attempt at any type of comedy.**


	2. A Dull Day at the Castle

The Adventures of HM Queen

A Dull Day at The Castle

Hello again everyone. It is I, the narrator Dunlow. Today is an extrodinaryly dull day at the castle and our beloved queen is bored. But as always, the people of the Harvest Moon villages of Mineral Town, Forget-Me-Not Valley, and Flower Bud Village come up with ways to keep our queen busy. Thus, begins out story.

The queen was sitting in her throne room throwing daggers at Karen's picture again when a strange blonde girl comes trotting in.

"Wha- how'd you get in here? My gaurds should have announced this or something..." said the queen staring at the blonde.

"Well...they wouldn't let me in but I flirted with them a bit and they let me come in." said the blode giggling.

"Great...now who are you?" asked the queen.

"I'm Muffy of Forget-Me-Not Valley." she replied.

"And what do you want?" said the queen annoyed.

"I want a brain. See, I'm pretty and all but sometimes guys get tired of the pretty girl and want a girl that they can hold a conversation with." Muffy replied in a giggly tone.

"I'm a magical queen, not God, and frankly you need a miracle of God to give someone as dense as you a brain." said the queen shoving Muffy out the door. "Well that was fun" said the queen to herself as she walked back to her throne. Then a dark haired woman walked into to throne room escorted by a gaurd.

"Well at least this one went through the proper method of getting in here. Who are you and what do you want?" asked the queen.

"I am Mana of Mineral Town and I have a problem with one of the villagers." replied the woman as the gaurd left.

"Which villager?" the queen asked.

"Duke, my husband." she replied.

"And what did he do?" asked the queen.

"He drinks wine all the time and comes home drunk every night, then he hits me when I don't have breakfast on the table as soon as he gets up the next day. I mean, it's hard to do all of the house work, plus go to the market everyday and sometimes I don't have time to make breakfast when he wants it. And when I don't make is favorite foods for any meal, he hits me. He has alot of favorites and it's so hard to keep up with them all and if I ask him what he wants, he hits me for not knowing already. And sometimes he hits me for no reason. And-"

"Ok ok I get it!" said the queen cutting Mana off mid-speech.

"So why does he hit me?" asked Mana

"2 reasons. He's a drunk and you NEVER shut up!" said the queen annoyed. Then Mana walked out of the room nodding her head in aggrement.

Well, that is all we have time for today, readers. Thank you for tuning in. This is your narrator signing off and tune in next time for the next installment of The Adventures of HM Queen.


End file.
